Your online date has been just
the most amazing person that you could ask for. The two of you met through one
of those fancy-shmansy dating platforms and sparks flew almost instantly, and
now, after 6 months of courtship, you’re ready to let the whole family know
about the next steps that you all have planned out ahead of you. The only thing
is that, you’re a single mother with a very young child, of about 5 or 6 of
age, and you’re now stuck in the dilemma of how you’re going to break the news
This is a scenario that many
people out there face. Not only single-moms, but single-dads as well.
Introducing your online boyfriend to your kid can be a tough process so we’ve
gone out and got you some of the best tips on how to let your kid know about
your online boyfriend, to help you with the process.
#1 Find a Right Time
Kids have their issues too. If
they’re attending pre-school or elementary, you may need to check with them
first that nothing negatively impressionable had occurred with them. Also, be
sure to double check that they are not cranky and are in a good mood before you
break the news to them. Start them slow and ease them into the whole thing.
Always keep in the back in the mind that this can be as significant to them as
it is to you, as they will also be accepting a new person into their life.
#2 Bring Your Boyfriend Along
It would always be better for
a child to be able to see the person in question. Kids usually do not respond
very well to auditory cues, so much of the time, merely telling them about the
existence of “Mommy’s boyfriend” many not be effective, neither will that be
enough. They respond much better to visual and sensory cues so it would be best
to allow them to see this new person and interact with them, shaking their hand
or giving them a hug. This would leave a lasting impression and indirectly
build the child’s trust on the person.
#3 Use Gifts
Bring gifts for your child to
celebrate the special occasion of having someone new within the family. It
would help if the gift came from your boyfriend, having being given a gift by
someone they didn’t know before helps them to earn brownie points with you kid.
Try to get a gift that both your boyfriend and your child can work on together,
like a puzzle or game set. That way, you’d be opening more doors for them to be
able to connect with each other.
#4 Let Them Ask Questions
Your kids are bound to be
curious about this new person so just let them ask all the questions that they
want to, both to you and your boyfriend. This is just their way of getting to
know the new person in front of them, as well as to assess the situation and
changes that they have been faced with. Try to answer their questions as
clearly as possible and be prepared for weird questions that you kid may ask.
At any cost, be sure to answer all the questions that they may have.
#5 Be Honest
Open up yourself to your
child. Explain to them how much this new person means to them and then ask them
in turn, what they think of this person. Let them answer as honestly as
possible. If they have any pain points, address them on the spot and if your
boyfriend can also provide assurance, it would be much better. The whole point
of this exercise is to have a heart-to-heart exchange on how everyone feels
about this major change in the family dynamics and to address them before
moving on as a brand new family unit.
Having a new person in the family out of the blue can be a complex concept for your child to understand so do give them ample time to process the information and their feelings, in relation to it. If they have any concerns that cause them to go into an emotional outburst, try to calm them down and explain to them clearly the current circumstance and assure them that nothing would change between you and them.
If you’re still looking for
that boyfriend to introduce to your child, you can check out our dating sites
reviews to see which ones cater towards those looking for a long-term
relationship and don’t mind having a kid in their relationships.